That which does not kill us, makes us stronger. - Nietzsche

Friday, August 3, 2012

funky funky funk

I haaaate funky moods.

Flu recovery was another setback and now my bike times are slower than they used to be, which makes me feel like I've made no progress. Aaaand don't get me started on my running pace, which was slower than usual to begin with, thank you stress fracture. Anyway, flu sticks with a person like krazy glue. It was not until about 10 days after the fever broke that I could run or bike without coughing like a smoker and feeling like someone had shrunk my lungs by 50%. And that was just this past Tuesday.

I have managed to not care about my run pace lately but I'm starting to care again. I'm starting to get into that place where I compare myself to anyone and everyone. It's ridiculous, I know. I ran 4 miles the other day and it felt great. It was slower than I used to run, sure, but I managed to not care. I was able to be realistic with myself and say, you know what, you missed three months of running, have only been back for a month, you dealt with the effects of the flu for two weeks....all things considering, you're kicking ass.

I wish I knew where *that* thought went.

I HATE THIS HEAT. Heat makes everything suck.

I went on an overnight work trip and I effed up my sleep schedule, which is probably what this is about more than anything. I do not do well when my sleep is messed up. Not at all.

I also didn't eat super healthy while on that trip. I didn't do *too* bad, considering, but I usually eat "bad" meals once a week or so. I did 2.5 or so in less than 48 hours. I've never had Raising Cane chicken fingers and I wanted to try them. Now they are sitting in my belly like a rock. Don't judge.

I was going to bike tonight and I decided to skip it because I know, given how I'm feeling, that it wouldn't go well and I'd just feel worse about everything.

However.......I'm 90% sure I'm doing an olympic tri this weekend. I know I'm not 100%, not at all, but I want the chance to do some actual tri practice - swimming with a mass of people, transitions, all that jazz - before rev3

So, a little poor self-care, nasty weather, workouts lately that have sucked more than they've rocked due to circumstances out of my control, and, hmm, my trademark impatience.

This will not be a permanent fixture, I promise. Every time I think about quitting training, I think, "Yeah, eff that!" about 2.5 seconds later. Next week I'm going to make sure I'm back to my training plan to the absolute best of my ability, and I'm keeping with the goal of being up to the training plan run volume by the end of August.

I will be fine. Training is a journey, that is all.

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